I don't know about other girls mom's but mine is the best! She is smart, fun, beautiful, loves the Lord, giving, caring, assertive, and she Loves me unconditionally. Growing up it was my hearts desire to be with my Mom and to make her pleased with me. Now that i am grown she is my best friend and I Love her so dearly. It scares me sometimes how much we are like one another.
As a mother myself now I have growing fears that my relationship with "G" will not turn out as my mother's and mine. I fear that she won't want to spend time with me when she is grown. That she just sees me as a strict Mom who fusses at her and doesn't let her do what she wants. I have been very convicted about this as of late. I feel like I need to take steps now to assure that we have a healthy Mother/Daughter relationship.
I was kept up all night Tuesday by an incident that had happened late that evening with G. She said something that was very troubling and I made her explain it to me so that I knew why she had said it. In getting this info from her I made her cry. It wasn't my goal but I NEEDED to know. It was a very serious matter and I needed the truth. But all night I thought, "she is scared of me, she doesn't feel safe with telling me things, I have failed". So in the morning I crawled into the bed with her and snuggled with her and assured her of my love and that she had not done anything wrong. That it was just Mommy's job to make sure she was safe and that was what I was doing. She seemed to understand and not think much of what had happened the night before at all.
I spoke with Hubby about my concerns and we decided I needed to do more with G one on one. To make more Mommy/Daughter time. Time where there was no room to be cleaned or brother to nag or task that Mommy had to tend to.
So I am taking G to get our nails done on Saturday. Nothing fancy, just a little time away just us girls to giggle and be ladies and bond. She is such a treasure to me and I want to communicate that to her without sounding like "lets be friends", because at this point she doesn't need a friend but a Mother. I am OPEN to all ideas and Godly advice to grow that special bond with her. I know the bond between Mother and Daughter is like NO other and I want to cultivate mine with G to make ours strong now and in the years to come. I ultimately know God is gracious and merciful and He hears my cries to Him and my plea's to be a Godly mother and to lead them in the way that brings Him the most glory. Because Ultimately that is all that matters.
Sorry for the venting session but my heart has been so heavy. Again I would love tips!